Catherine Prentice - Non Hodgkin’s Lymphoma
I am Cathrine Prentice. I was born in a small town named Silchar in the state of Assam in India.I am here to tell you a story. My story.
Yes, just like everyone who tell their stories, I am also someone who has experienced a very rough patch in my life.
I want to tell you my story not to gain pity or to make you cry. I want to tell this story to reach out to anyone out there who may be going through what I went through.
I had no one to understand to really understand my inner most feelings) at that point. So what I most sincerely want is my story to help anyone who may be feeling exactly as I had felt while I was in that state of utter loss and helplessness.
One day I suddenly started bleeding from my nose and mouth. I was seventeen. My parents consulted with the doctor who told us that I had sinusitis. I was then put under medication and treatment for sinusitis for a full year.
The medicine did not help at all. I would sometimes have fever, and sometimes felt very weak with a kind of pain on the left side of my chest.
The next year I lost my father. He died due to some wrong treatment at only 45. My parents stayed together for only 18 years. It was not easy for my mother.
Mean-while, a group of doctors from Hyderabad were visiting Silchar for a conference on pin-hole surgery. My uncle and my mother took the opportunity to consult about my case.
The doctor wanted to meet me and on telling him everything from the very start, he asked me to go for a chest x-ray that day itself.
Going through the report I was advised by the doctor to get another chest x-ray done.
After going through both the reports the doctor called back my guardians and told them that I had a black shadow on the left side of my lung. He suspected lung cancer and told my mom and Uncle to go with them to Kolkata the next morning.
On reaching Kolkata,I had to undergo a C.T.Scan. The C.T.Scan report showed two tumors on my left lung confirming the doctor’s suspicion. I was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma (NHL) stage 2A.
All this happened only 2 weeks after my Father’s passing away and here I was standing on the same track unable to understand anything. ‘This surely couldn’t be happening to ME’ I thought. I couldn’t accept the fact that I had really been hit by Cancer. Why ME? I had no idea how to face it, let alone fight it.
In Kolkata, on the doctor’s instruction I was admitted to hospital without any delay (St Mary’s Nursing Home at Ho Chi Minh Sarani Kolkata). Surgery was suggested and carried out but during the surgery my family was informed that things were a little complicated as both the tumors were black and pretty large already having spread the cancer cells. I was in danger of not making it.
The doctor then took a decision on the permission of my family, of completely removing my entire left lung without tampering with the tumors. After a full 9 and a half harrowing hours my family was happy to hear the words – ‘The Operation was successful’ .
Then from Tata Hospital they suggested that I go for chemotherapy. I was under Dr.Adwani (Head of department Oncology) in the Tata Memorial Hospital in Mumbai. We then returned to Kolkata and I was admitted again to the hospital for chemotherapy.
I didn’t know initially what this chemotherapy was all about. Later the doctor told me about it.
At this point as I sit and think back I truly don’t know how to continue. Going back to that deep dark path of my life is like feeling the pain all over again. (Dear Father in heaven, please give me grace……. !)
Here started my treatment- and the very very long journey of Chemotherapy, Bone Marrow stimulants and steroids.
As much as I hate to remind myself about it , I have to share hard facts and the hard fact remains that Chemotherapy is very painful. In fact the use of the word ‘painful’ is just an understatement.
The first 4 cycles of chemotherapy was very painful. Besides the chemotherapy I had to undergo spine stimulants four times over. This injection in the spine is given without any anesthesia.
After these 4 cycles of chemotherapy I started losing my hair. One of my most precious possessions was my long hair which I cared for a lot.
Losing this was a nightmare for me. The first clumps of hair falling, was the worst moment in my life. I didn’t know how to face the fact that it was actually happening to me. I spent my whole day in tears and just couldn’t bear to look at myself in the mirror. Three full years of my life I spent undergoing 12 cycles of Chemotherapy. As the medicine traveled through my veins it was like my veins and muscles were being ripped apart. Often the pain was almost unbearable. I didn’t know how to bear the pain so I would end up biting my hand or digging my nails into my skin scratching myself.
Each cycle was a different kind of pain which brought with it a different kind of problem each time.
No one prepared me for all this and at that point of time I didn’t know how to face it , let alone go through it. I stopped looking at the mirror because what I saw was not me. I found myself looking horrible. I had no hair, my complexion had begun to change along with other skin problems, there were ulcers in the throat that stopped me from being able to eat. Whatever I tried to swallow , even liquids would make me bleed.
Visiting hours had begun to become intolerable. I didn’t look forward to friends and family coming to visit me. I couldn’t stand the noise that accompanied it.
I preferred solitude and would rather be on my own , alone with my pains and problems as I felt that no one could really understand what I was going through.
After completing 12 cycles of chemotherapy I survived. It’s been more than 20 years. But somehow somewhere I believe the fact that I survived only because of His Grace. Initially I had been diagnosed with carcinoma and the doctors predicted that I would not survive. Not losing any hope, my family requested the doctor to go for another diagnosis. All the churches were informed to pray for me. And miraculously God answered all prayers and He turned the report to Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma (NHL) stage 2A. Solely by His Grace I survived. God granted me new life. To say that I’m thankful to God for giving me this testimonial life is but an understatement. Praise His Name!
From day one I took on this challenge because I knew that I was too young to die; that was all that kept popping into my mind and which kept me going. My mother was the only one in my family to support and strengthen me after my dad’s passing, she was there physically as much as possible & mentally with me all through. She had to however leave me to go back home to Silchar so that she could send money for my treatment.
I did have family in Kolkata but they stayed very far from the hospital so they could not come & visit me in the hospital as often apart from the once or twice in a month visits.
At this point, Mom was my only family support in almost every way. That moment was not easy for me to overcome anything by myself.
It was a very long lonely three years for me to fight this dreadful time in my life with no one right beside me. It was our ever faithful God who became my complete strength and support at that time. This was the time I actually drew near to God, though I knew about Him and all that before. Now I drew on His strength wholly now than ever before. If not for His Grace I would never have been able to fight back.
I came close to God and He became my Fortress and Savior. I am alive and have overcome death all because My Creator, My God wanted me to. He blessed me with new life .From the very beginning I never stopped fighting back because deep within I knew and believed that I would survive. And today my friends i am alive. I won death."I'am a survivor".
"Praise His Holy Name"...!
Yes, my friends, all I’d like to say is NEVER give up hope ALWAYS believe in yourself and your Creator. Somewhere you might be weak and lose hope and want to give up fighting back. All the roads might seem tough and circumstances and even people around might not be strong enough to help you. It is at this particular moment of deepest despair that you need to always remember your God has not left you and will Never! Never! Never! leave you till the end. That is what He promised....."I will never leave thee nor never forsake thee"...! Hebrews13:5
"Believe in your-self and fight back you will win".
Some verses from the Bible to help fight the battle are:
“All things are possible- Luke 18: 27 “ What is humanly impossible is possible for God”
“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity,( or fear) but a spirit of power, of love and of self discipline.” 2 Timothy 1: 7
Psalm 3:2-6 NIV
2 Many are saying of me, “God will not deliver him.”
3 But you, LORD, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high.
4 I call out to the LORD, and he answers me from his holy mountain.
5 I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the LORD sustains me.
6 I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side.
Zephaniah 3:17
“The LORD your God in your midst, the Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”
Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you. ... But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment.
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 14:27)